Hmm. This is hard to write because there seems to be so many things and thoughts going at the same time.
- Online Coherence Healing #2
- Beverly Jane Reynolds / BJ / Soul Mom
- Sanata Dharma • Asha Nayaswami
- RJ Spina • "Challenge"
- Symbol "H" - Hole. Avoidance
- "Die then."
- "Where/What is your safety?" • Asha Nayaswami
Online Coherence Healing #2
I was very grateful to find another single spot for Online Coherence Healing from the Aussie group ("The Coherent Heart"). The hosts were: Pru D, Ian, Simona) 20th May 2025; 6:15am
(See more info in Day One)
(See more info in Day One)
Got up at 4am. Did a long round of meditation. Then the Coherence healing.
I fell asleep in the middle of the focus prayer of healing for me. I was all tingly and ready and eager ... and I fell asleep! It must be the best thing for me. Anyway, woke up an hour after it was all over!!
I tried to screen-video the zoom. I know they said not to but I really wanted to re-hear the prayer they did for me in the first healing and couldn't. So I thought I would attempt to record this time. The Universe must be nodding disapprovingly too because at the end of it, I had the screen recording but no sound. So I am deleting the video.
I think I continued to sleep on for a while. When I got up, it was close to noon. I felt ...
restless.
Eventually I went for a walk with Reef. Around noon. Was gone for 2½ hours. Trying to sort my restlessness ... and even, unease.
Walk
Beverly - my Soul Mom 💙💜🖤
Additional Note: Just by "coincidence", on my walk I was wearing jumper from Beverly: first time this year. It was a present from her and I found it on my doorstep, all the way from America, when I returned home from surgery and 5 days in hospital in Melbourne, in June 2015.
The following is not in sequence; I am not sure there is a linear sequence. The thoughts and realizations just come in at their own timing. But I shall try to bring some order in my remembrance.
Asha Nayaswami - "Sanata Dharma"
I came across Asha only maybe a few days ago. I don't even know why. But I not only find her captivating but her teachings/lectures hold my complete attention. And also, she has pointed/opened the path to the Master. I don't know why but I am grateful.
The first time Asha mentioned "Sanata Dharma" - a few days ago - it struck me as familiar. She has mentioned it a few times since. And then - ding! - that is the phrase from Star Trek, Second Generation!!! (Even Pete recognised it!!) I thought they were just made-up nonsensical words!!
Sanatan Dharma / Sanatana Dharma/ or as I originally thought, Sanarth and Dharma - is a Sanskrit word. Asha says it basically means, "Eternal Religion" or her preferred translation, "That Which Is".
She says it means, "the underlying principles behind Self Realization" or as Master calls, "The unifying reality behind all spiritual religions in the world."
Doesn't seem to have much to do with my current challenge. But somehow, it does.
Asha says, • Karma, • Reincarnation, • Chakras are a part of Sanata Dharma.
Sanata Dharma - THAT WHICH IS
I have been asking for a sign for the Universe for weeks now: something to show me that it is listening and/or that I am on the right path. But I have not gotten anything. And now I think I know why.
Yes, I have been diligient and perservered and worked very hard on Dr Joe and meditations and keeping positive and going for walks and sleeping well and waking early and Tai Chi and QiCong Lift Chi Up .. but I fear I always knew somewhere deep in me ...
I have been working very hard, with no sign from the Universe, because I have been avoiding my situation. I was not denying it but I didn't want to face it. My deepest wish was that the tumour - any and all tumours would disappear from my body and I would not have to face any surgery or chemo. I didn't want to deal with that. So I worked very hard to avoid it.
But it is what it is.
And while I seem to have been very strong on one hand, I had not realized how much of my inner fear I had not faced. It wasn't even a fear of death, per se. It was my fear of the tumour and/or the fear that my body would not be able to help me and heal itself. It was the fear of the unknown ... where all the medical tests, scans, procedures might lead. That was the unknown I feared.
RJ Spina
By an unexpected occurence, I was introduced to RJ Spina and his books and story. I even bought his book, "Supercharged Self Healing". I have also been listening to him reading that book on YT (https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLldTF0w7-fnML-rNrtM-ibhKQYQeZsKBZ).
So far, it had only been Chap 1-2. But I am already starting to get some unsettling misgivings about this persona. Nonetheless, I know that the Divine can send us messages using anyone and anything - even someone "shonky".
Whether he is or not, there was a part in his reading where he talked about meeting the CHALLENGE of a health condition no matter how difficult. (Something like that.) And as is his wont at certain points, he looks directly through the camera into one's eyes. I didn't exactly like/want/enjoy/agree with everyone having to accept the CHALLENGE and dismissed it as best I could.
However on my walk, his eyes and works came most powerfully into my mind.
I have to accept my challenge. I have been working hard on the sidelines in the hope I never have to engage with the challenge in the center. But I must accept the challenge.
Not go round;
Go RIGHT THROUGH THE CHALLENGE.
Go RIGHT THROUGH THE CHALLENGE.
And for the rest of my walk and rest and walk - I had been grappling with how to Accept this reality. And asking for Divine Assistance to give me Courage, Grace, Clarity, Wisdom, Strength ... to accept what is and still be strong and brave: Fearless. To more than know that I am not my body. My body is my God given tool and vessel.
Symbol "H" -- Hole???!!!
It is almost as if the Universe is having a bit of a 'poke and giggle' at me - or my sub-conscious is. I also suddently realised, not without a smidge of smirking irony that my evolving H-symbol could also represent "Hole". And that, unconsciously, was what I have been trying very hard to do in the last 3 months: bury the tumour and any other possible medical bad news in a hole and cover it all with all the positive futures and mediatations I could!!!
"Die then."
While I was at the beach I came to a gasped stop when I arrived at, "Die then."
In the book, "Autobiography of a Yogi", the Master is recounting how when he was at Benares, there was a time when he was trying to complain to the head swami, Dyananda that if he, Paramahansa, followed the head swami's instructions of not asking for food, then he might starve to death if no one remembered to feed him.
And Dyananda's reply was, "Die then."
He then went on to counsel Parmahansa thus,
"Die if you must Mukunda! Never admit that you live by the power of food and not by the power of God! He who has created every form of nourishment, He who has bestowed appetite, will certainly see that His devotee is sustained! Do not imagine that rice maintains you, or that money or men support you! Could they aid if the Lord withdraws your life breath? They are His indirect instruments merely. Is it by any skill of yours that food digests in your stomach? Use the sword of your discrimination, Mukunda! Cut through the chains of agency and perceive the Single Cause!”
But it was the first shocking, "Die then" words that got me.
Yes, I was worried about whether to go with the Western medicine route or to heal by Dr Joe's work ... more accurately, by Faith and Belief in shifting energy to bring about a full healing. And as Dr Joe once said that perhaps the worst pain is the pain of indecision. I was in indecision.
But the startling, "Die then" was like someone taking hold of my shoulders and giving me a good shake. Maybe the decision was not really all that hard or all that important.
Where/What is your safety?
Asha often repeats this question; as a question to live and be guided by. And I think it was this question that was the niggling catalyst that brought about these painful insights on this page.
Because without faith (in God/Universe/myself), there is no safety to be felt. We will always be running from some form of fear because without that sense of deep and abiding safety, every path is laden with danger.
And without full faith in the Western method of cut, burn, chemicalize and without full faith in myself or God... there can only be fear.
And I am going to instill Faith in myself because God/the Universe is with me and I am always Divinely guided.
All is Well.
Hoala 好了
Addendum 21 May 2025:
Today, on my walk while listening to "Autobiography of a Yogi", the message for me today was in the first of the 3 stories of Sri Yukteswar's personal life which he related to his new devotee, Paramahansa. The moral, he said was,
"Look fear in the face and it will cease to trouble you."
Today, on my walk while listening to "Autobiography of a Yogi", the message for me today was in the first of the 3 stories of Sri Yukteswar's personal life which he related to his new devotee, Paramahansa. The moral, he said was,
"Look fear in the face and it will cease to trouble you."
And so it is so.
