I Want To Go Home

I Want To Go Home

These words have been with me so long I can no longer remember when I first became consciously aware of them. And they still have the power to evoke the deepest longings in me.

Yesterday I saw the movie "Moon" - a science fiction with a strong story line. (A good review can be found at Moon: A Personal Movie Review)

There is a line from the main character (Sam Bell) when he cries out with desperation and over-whelming sadness, "I just want to go home". Those lines, those words, that meaning, that longing ~ every gossamer fiber of my soul responds to it with an unbelievable feeling of loss and unfathomable yearning.

And just like the main protagonist in the movie, Sam Bell, I long for "home" even though what "home" is is no longer clear and accurate. It is almost a memory, more of a feeling and like a knowing of what it used to be. It is coded so deep down that it is hard to draw a visual picture of it.

I don't claim or think I am one of those "star seeded children" that was so popular a concept once or that I am so kind of alien lost in this physical Earth world (though I can't say that I have ever really felt nor found any deep sense of "belonging" here). I only know that the feeling of "wanting to go home" is so deep seated in me that it is an actual hurt (not to be there). I don't know what it means. I don't know if there are others who feel like this and respond with the same deep loss and yearning when they hear the words, "I just want to go home". I only know I do.